Since I'm new at this blogging thing, I'm going to upload some portions of things I've written in the past. That's why there are posts that are older than "my first blog post ever."
Tuesday, June 30, 2009
Monday, June 1, 2009
Are You Afraid of the Dark?
Last night while we were traveling, I had a lot of trouble falling asleep. Everyone else had gone to bed. I should have been tired, but I just couldn’t fall asleep. I decided to ask God for protection over our hotel room again. I asked for peace and protection and for some other things. I don’t know what else I asked for, but finally I must have fallen asleep.
Around 1:20am, I woke up and really had to pee. It was pretty much pitch dark in our room, and Sara was sleeping beside me, so I couldn’t turn on the light. I really wanted to ignore my bladder and just go back to sleep, but I couldn’t. Finally I gave in and got out of bed using the indiglo light on my watch to find my shoes and the squatty potty. When I finished, I washed my hands as quickly as I could and raced back to the security of my bed.
When I got back to my bed, however, I heard a noise like running water coming from the bathroom. My first thought was that I hadn’t turned the sink off all the way and that the water was still running, but then I remembered the hot water heater and thought maybe it was the culprit. I tried to ignore the noise and just go back to sleep, but I couldn’t. If it really was the sink, I didn’t want it to keep running until morning and waste so much water.
I laid in bed like a little child afraid of the dark. I didn’t want to get out of bed again to check on the sink, but I felt like God wanted me to go. I pictured myself as a little 3 year old like Grayson with my dad asking me to go turn of the sink in the dark, and I thought “Yeah, but Stephen would go with Grayson and hold his hand.” God softly replied, “I am with you.” It was as if He was telling me, “I’m not going to make you get up again, but in this moment you can either choose to overcome your fear or let your fear overcome you.”
I spoke Jesus’s Name for a while hoping He’d stop the noise for me, so I wouldn’t have to get up. I had the song “God is bigger than the air we breathe, this world we’ll leave; God will save the day…” running through my head. Finally I picked up my watch again and went back into the bathroom to check the sink – it was already off. I switched off the hot water heater and rushed back to bed again. Soon the noise stopped, but I still couldn’t fall asleep. I started talking to God again, asking for restful sleep, protection, and guarded minds and dreams for everyone else with me. Then I realized I was asking for everyone except myself. I could picture a sphere of protection around everyone else, but in my mind, I was outside the sphere. I started asking for myself, too, and claiming that protection. I kept asking and finally fell asleep again. I slept pretty peacefully the rest of the night, but I still don’t know what was going on to keep me awake – I don’t know if it was spiritual attack or God waking me up to talk to Him. Either way, God kept us all safe and helped me start overcoming some of my fears.
Around 1:20am, I woke up and really had to pee. It was pretty much pitch dark in our room, and Sara was sleeping beside me, so I couldn’t turn on the light. I really wanted to ignore my bladder and just go back to sleep, but I couldn’t. Finally I gave in and got out of bed using the indiglo light on my watch to find my shoes and the squatty potty. When I finished, I washed my hands as quickly as I could and raced back to the security of my bed.
When I got back to my bed, however, I heard a noise like running water coming from the bathroom. My first thought was that I hadn’t turned the sink off all the way and that the water was still running, but then I remembered the hot water heater and thought maybe it was the culprit. I tried to ignore the noise and just go back to sleep, but I couldn’t. If it really was the sink, I didn’t want it to keep running until morning and waste so much water.
I laid in bed like a little child afraid of the dark. I didn’t want to get out of bed again to check on the sink, but I felt like God wanted me to go. I pictured myself as a little 3 year old like Grayson with my dad asking me to go turn of the sink in the dark, and I thought “Yeah, but Stephen would go with Grayson and hold his hand.” God softly replied, “I am with you.” It was as if He was telling me, “I’m not going to make you get up again, but in this moment you can either choose to overcome your fear or let your fear overcome you.”
I spoke Jesus’s Name for a while hoping He’d stop the noise for me, so I wouldn’t have to get up. I had the song “God is bigger than the air we breathe, this world we’ll leave; God will save the day…” running through my head. Finally I picked up my watch again and went back into the bathroom to check the sink – it was already off. I switched off the hot water heater and rushed back to bed again. Soon the noise stopped, but I still couldn’t fall asleep. I started talking to God again, asking for restful sleep, protection, and guarded minds and dreams for everyone else with me. Then I realized I was asking for everyone except myself. I could picture a sphere of protection around everyone else, but in my mind, I was outside the sphere. I started asking for myself, too, and claiming that protection. I kept asking and finally fell asleep again. I slept pretty peacefully the rest of the night, but I still don’t know what was going on to keep me awake – I don’t know if it was spiritual attack or God waking me up to talk to Him. Either way, God kept us all safe and helped me start overcoming some of my fears.
Saturday, May 16, 2009
Our Adventures in Delhi
We’ve been in Delhi for about 3 days now, but it feels more like a week or two. The last few days have been a whirlwind of adjusting to Indian food, only eating with our right hands, dealing with the scorching heat (Okay, maybe not scorching, but when you’re outside in the sun all day long and you have to wear long pants to be dressed appropriately, it’s pretty hot!), shopping for new clothes and fabric to make clothes, buying new cell phones, bargaining with auto rickshaw drivers who think that we’ll pay double because we’re foreigners, and all sorts of other things I’m sure I’ve forgotten. It’s been somewhat crazy, but we’ve accomplished a lot.
Wednesday, May 13, 2009
On the Final Plane Ride
We’re less than 2 hours from landing and I still don’t believe it’s real. This day has been a long time in coming yet it seems like it’s gotten here really fast – does that even make sense to anyone except me? I know there are exciting adventures and great friendships ahead as well as many sorrows and suffering. I look forward to the next 2 years with excitement as well as uncertainty. I know God has led me here and will guide me the rest of the way. My mixed feelings are mostly only in the background of my thoughts, though, because it’s hard to be excited or worried about something that hasn’t hit me as real yet.
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